Questions and Answers

What’s a red flag when finding a daddy online, or in general?

bedtimestoriesforbrokengirls:

Beware a leader who is never wrong.

Even if you have a shared understanding that he’s always right —that it isn’t your place to acknowledge his failings— you should still be able to see him processing his mistakes. Even if he never, ever apologizes to you, he should be capable of perceiving when he’s been unnecessarily or inadvertently hurtful to people, and comfortable making it right. Even if he’s the greatest man in the world, you should see him trying to grow.

Don’t settle for a god who won’t deign to walk among men.

Another one that crossed my mind today:

Stupid, self-defeating girls often say, “I don’t want to hear a man talk about his exes when he’s out with me!” First, that’s absurd… cuckqueans are hot, so you should relish the opportunity to squirm for him while he uses other women to map your insecurities.

But there are practical concerns as well. You want a guy to tell you all about his exes, in as much detail as he’ll openly offer. Don’t come at him conspiratorially, like you’re fishing for dirt… just open the door to the discussion, and watch what walks through.

Because if all his exes are crazy, you’ll be crazy too. If all his exes are bitches, you’re a bitch-in-waiting. If the recurring theme in his recollection is contempt or anger or she’s-always-the-problem, you will not be the girl to break the streak. Watch how he frames the blame, and how thoughtful he is in its apportioning. Watch for contempt pretending to be sympathy. Watch what he values, and what he doesn’t consider worth a mention.

He’s in charge. His patterns matter. You will fall into them whether you want to or not.

So pay attention, dummy.