Okay, both of you goofy motherfuckers need to learn to laugh a little. I mean, sure, a fart can be a real mood-killer in certain circumstances —if he’d been going down on you, for example— but it might also be an entirely predictable occurrence if he’s roughly pumping objects in and out of your assorted nether-holes. Vaginas and buttholes sometimes make unladylike noises, especially when girls aren’t acting like ladies.
But there are basically two appropriate responses to a girlfart:
- Without losing a stroke, he continues to pound away, but now he’s telling you how vile and disgraceful it is that such a pretty girl would be so disrespectful of her man while he’s trying to make sweet love to her, and now he’s going to have to hurt you to make things right. (He was, of course, going to make it hurt anyway, but your guilt needs a place to go.) He cums and you feel forgiven.
- He laughs, slaps you on the ass, and gets back to work, because he’s an adult and who the fuck cares?
Nowhere on that list will you find “he says ‘ew’, bails, and treats you like a squashed bug that had the temerity to stain his shoe with its guts.” If he’s your dom, he’s bad at it. Expect adult reactions from adults, and accept nothing less.
(Unless you’re willing to put up with a certain amount of infantile cluelessness in exchange for undying devotion… or is that just me?)