are (past) self harm scars a firm no for you for girls? sorry for a dumb question, i’m just curious, honestly.

I have a few “firm no”s, but they’re mostly behavioral.
I have lots of things I don’t think are pretty: body art, fat ankles, big mouths, flat hair, squinty eyes, hairy pits, undersized butt cracks… we could go on with this forever. And yeah, scars would be on the list.
…but pretty isn’t everything. It’s important, and might be the thing that makes you just a touch more pleasing than the next girl… so if you’ve got it, by all means flaunt it. But if you don’t, just compensate. Say “no” less than the pretty girls. Say “yes” more often. Devalue your time so that you’re willing to drop anything to be at my beck and call. When the pretty girls are looking in the mirror, look for your own reflection in my eyes. I may never love the look or feel of you, but if you make yourself a part of me —a limb or an organ— then I’ll never want to leave you behind, no matter what shape you’re in.
And besides, affection gives imperfection a special glow. Good girls magically become prettier… it’s like obedience is your fairy godmother, and a wave of her wand smooths your skin and makes your eyes warmer and your touch more appealing.
Don’t allow your dreams to be held hostage by a petty limitation of your flesh. Be more than your scars. You can absolutely do it.