I only get loud and angry when someone’s doing something self-destructive, and then it’s a scolding, corrective anger, not blind rage. I’m actually really bad at maintaining a head of steam… outside of extreme circumstances, my anger subsides quickly. In reality, I’m almost always calm.
And cold? The last thing anyone would call me is “cold”. If anything, I’m overly sentimental and take on more responsibility for others’ situations than I really should. The closest I come to “cold” is distancing myself from people after they’ve hurt me —which is a rare thing— and the way I make newbies spend months or years convincing me that they truly need what I am.
(It occurs to me I need one of those amusement park signs, altered to read “YOU MUST BE THIS DETERMINED TO RIDE THE RIDE”.)
I know it probably seems weird to you, but honestly, my sadism is primarily calm and warm.
It’s a hug that begins to crush you. It’s a lobster, boiling in a pot. It’s a touch that subtly stains you, and It’s always sweet, until it’s not.