Questions and Answers person holding red lipstick

My daddy has been refusing to eat me out because apparently that’s “too much work”…

…so today I was masturbating in front of him and he was like I’m gonna fuck and i said, no you aren’t. Took my fingers out of my cunt, put them in my mouth while looking him dead in the eyes and said “you’re missing out I taste fucking amazing”. Put my clothes on and left him with a hard on. Don’t know why I’m telling you this, but I feel like one powerful sassy little princess today

(submitted by: @Anonymous)

I guess everyone needs a little black dress and an empowering break-up story. And I’m sure it’s for the best… the world is full of indulgent men who will no doubt delight in slobbering upon Your Highness’s petite pearl. Or barring that, you can at least find someone whose reason for denying you sounds less like a a kid explaining to his mom why he doesn’t want to clean his room.

(Yes, I’m comparing your vagina to five unmatched pairs of crusty socks and a plate of old French fries slowly decomposing under a collapsed stack of PS3 discs. You’re welcome.)

With that said: please note: despite what boys have told you since you were old enough to hold a dick, erections don’t actually hurt, sexual frustration isn’t actually an overwhelming psychic tax on the male mind, and in the absence of a medical condition, you’ll seldom actually leave a guy with a hard on… if he has any pride at all, your ability to arouse him ended the minute your contempt filled the room.