This is the happiest I’ve ever been emotionally, but physically I’m not satisfied. I feel guilty for breaking up with someone because of that.
(submitted by: @Anonymous)
If he were me —and you were thus a certain kind of girl— he’d laugh at you and ask what on earth gave you the idea that your sexual satisfaction is a goal, when it’s clearly just a tool —a lever, fit to move your world— that he can use to crack open your poorly-secured little heart and plunder the meager riches within? Then you’d get embarrassed and confused, forget about the whole thing, and fall asleep hugging his leg.
But he’s not me, and you seem like a normal-ish person, so my response is this:
Have you made a thoughtful, well-discussed, and mutual effort to address the sexual incompatibilities? If not, do so. Meaningful happiness and substantive support aren’t things to be lightly set aside… if you haven’t talked it through and tried to reach a shared set of expectations, you’re selling yourself short.
If, however, you have had those talks, and you were rebuffed or ignored or let down… of course it’s okay to leave. If you know what you need and you know you’ll never have it, all the happiness and support in the world won’t stop you from becoming first restless, then resentful. And frankly, you owe both your partner and yourself better than to bring such a slow, sour end to something that has been beautiful in its season.
Never feel guilty for learning what you want.