Questions and Answers

When it comes to her, you’re saying that trying isn’t even enough – she…

When it comes to her, you’re saying that trying isn’t even enough – she has to commit to making a sacrifice. But when it comes to him, he’s making a huge mistake because he wants to make a sacrifice? If this isn’t double standards I don’t know what it is. Anon – we’re all just strangers online who don’t know you, please make your own judgement to decide how you want to move forward!

(submitted by: Anonymous)

I think you’ve wandered into the wrong neighborhood, Sandra.

  1. I said she has to commit. She can commit to finding some form of a poly relationship that works for her, or she can commit to seek her happiness with someone more compatible. What she can’t do is the nothing of stalling for time. Because it’s just going to make him unhappy and her guilty, precisely the problem we’re trying to avoid.
  2. She does not want his sacrifice. It is in vain. It will make her feel shitty about herself. It will sink them like a rock. So yes, it is a huge mistake.
  3. I was also quite clear that the burden of this thing rests on him… he’s in charge and wants to change things, so he needs to lead the search for a relationship configuration that works for them.
  4. This is a kinky relationship we’re talking about. All the standards are doubled.
  5. You’re a stranger online. I’m someone whose opinion actually matters to the anon. We are not the same.