please could you give us some tips on how to not be gaslit or manipulated by men like you?😅
(submitted by: Anonymous)
Men like me?
If you don’t want to be manipulated, that’s easy. I don’t chase girls, so don’t follow me around begging to be treated like a horny little trashcan and you’ll have nothing to fear. As far as I’m concerned, you’ll be an ineligible receiver.
Also, I don’t do much gaslighting. I mean, I play around a bit… I momentarily convinced Blossom that she hadn’t finished a piece of pizza when she knew she had, for example, then laughed at her for falling for it. But undermining someone’s sense of truth doesn’t work for me at any significant scale… I’m into this shit for the long-term, so unmooring a girl from reality means I’ll just have a continually confused burden on my hands, one that’s gonna hang around for years to come. No thanks.
But in general? Some things to consider:
- His inconsistencies aren’t in your head. When you ask him about them, you should get a thoughtful answer that’s more about him than you.
- Conversations —even intense ones— wander off-course. That’s normal. But if you’re talking to him about something significant, he changes the subject, and you eventually try to return to the original point… watch his reaction. The things a man won’t discuss are as important as the things he will.
- If you only feel warmth when he wants something, that’s not affection he’s spreading… it’s lubricant. And someone’s about to be fucked.
- He doesn’t have to like your friends. He doesn’t have to like your parents. But he shouldn’t be threatened by your relationships with them.
- Listen to what he claims to value, and when he does something you don’t understand, ask yourself how his behavior is getting him what he wants. If there’s no clear line between points A and B, then he’s either an idiot, or he’s hiding his motivations from you.