every time I reallllllly need to go to the bathroom and I’m just… able to, freely, without waiting or holding? Every time, I think “gee I’m so glad I’m not Puddles” 🤭
I’m sure you’ll find any number of circumstances in life where things are considerably easier due to you being not-Puddles.
- You can drink all you want —of anything you want— before bed without consequence.
- You’ll never run out of towels while mopping your own urine from the floor and find yourself wondering if sweaters absorb pee.
- You’re seldom going to face a choice between wetting your bed and chugging down a Stanleyfull of unfortunately concentrated girlpiss.
- Your bladder is a prosaic internal organ, and not a source of entertainment for everyone around you.
- When you squirm, it’s because you’re a disgusting, horny animal overcome by the ravenous desires of her relentless vagina… when she squirms, it’s because she’s not worthy of using a toilet.