hisblossom:

seeing a pattern and rubbing my two brain cells together, i cannot help but notice that the rules of ‘snitches get stitches’ only apply to me – in stark contrast to when anyone snitches on me and they get rewarded 🥺🤨

Just be glad that I’m so understanding of your perverse inclinations, and forgive you for loving sandwiches more than me.

Salami skank.