Where is the line between dominance and abuse? At the end of the day, I guess it’s consent. But if a person is vulnerable and easily manipulated, what would be red flag to show a Dom is abusive? Idk if that’s worded well but I hope you get what I mean!!💕
(submitted by: Anonymous)
First, I don’t think consent is the line. Consent is meaningless in the moment. Either you are with a dom who respects your humanity or you’re not. Consent is only meaningful to someone who values it.
The real line is responsibility. It’s not a matter of what he’ll do if you tell him “no”… it’s a matter of what he won’t do, even if you say “yes”. It’s acknowledging what he’s doing, and making you a partner in his project. It’s knowing that things can be right and wrong, all at once.
And for the record, the biggest red flag is anger. Particularly if it’s sustained or omnidirectional. There is no respite for a girl at the feet of a raging man.