I’ve followed you for some time now. At first, I followed you with a horrified fascination; although I have long known and accepted how very, very broken I am, you still reach into a dark part of myself that I couldn’t quite understand until more recently. Your writing is intense and incredible.
I’m older than the girls you go for, highly educated (three university degrees) and in a position of responsibility and power in my career. Not your type, but I confess I still harbor a small yearning and subsequent sting of humiliation when I read your thoughts. I am proud of all that I am, but I also proud that behind the facade, there is a submissive, emotionally masochistic wife who strives to fulfil every one of her husband’s most disgusting, brutal desires. And when I just can’t submit to everything that’s fine, because sometimes he likes me to fight and scream until I’m raw. He still gets his way.
I’m sending this because I want to thank you, quite simply. Thank you, for being part of my journey.
(submitted by: Anonymous)
For the record, you can be forty and still be a significantly younger woman to me. Much of the appeal of the younger ones is simply that they’re unencumbered… it’s hard to say “drop everything and be at Gate 10 on the 5th of next month” to someone with a husband, a mom who has to be checked on three times a week, a TPS report that’s due in 72 hours, and a book club full of nosy bitches who will ask questions.
Also, my orbit has contained doctors, lawyers, PhDs, IT pros, nurses, customer service specialists, waitresses, and starving students, among other things… so your education and career wouldn’t make you as much an outlier as you suspect.
But who cares? You’ve clearly got an awesome husband making you happy, and good for you! If I had anything to do with how satisfying your marriage is, I’m calling it a win.
You’re welcome.