You know what’s missing from this kink scene? The one immutable characteristic of a woman that no one takes the time and artisanal pride to degrade with any enthusiasm?
We need more southpaw-shaming.
How many of you left-handed perverts are out there, rubbing your clits counter-clockwise or some weird shit, trying to be little but realizing you still can’t cut construction paper like a normal four year old, and turning your hand into a crab claw so you can scribble your deepest, darkest, most awkward, and klutzy thoughts into your dream journal?
No more sex with your left hand, freak. No more touching men’s cocks with that back-assward man-grabber of yours. The entire world voted, and we don’t want you sitting next to us in a restaurant booth.
Yeah, this feels right.