You’re like Charlie Brown with a vagina and a lifetime of abuse… I love hearing about how someone has pulled the ball away from you yet again.
Me, to a girl who probably should have steered clear
Category: Conversations
Talking, teasing, manipulating, debating, and delighting
What or where is your happy place?
Daddy’s arms with him stroking my hair and telling me that I’m a good girl.
So, basically, it’s him soothing you like an animal while he fills your little brain with nonsense.
That sounds right.
Deviant sexual urges are like decay. But not in the way you think.
People are turned off by destruction and putrification. They don’t want to admit it exists, and they try as hard as they can to hide it from their minds, even though it’s as natural as the sun rising.
But bad things exist. They exist for a reason. The fungus that feeds off the corpse is just as important as the corpse used to be.
I think you just called me an important fungus.
My Fetishes?
I’ve always been attracted to the sound women make when they’re feeling particularly small and ineffectual, but I didn’t have a name for it. MTV came to my rescue ten years ago, during a scene on Laguna Beach where two of the hotter, meaner girls were shopping, and one of them was making a kind of whimpering, whiny, squeak as she struggled to reach an item on a high shelf.
“You’re making the Reaching Noise,” the other one noted.
I am all about the Reaching Noise.
The best part of this post is @bedtimestoriesforbrokengirls watching Laguna Beach.
It’s right up there with the tit punching guy wearing a MLP shirt on the list of things that make me super happy.
Watch it, or you and I are so dunzo.
This actually reminds me of a conversation I had with Bows. She kept repeating something, and I told her to “stop trying to make ‘fetch’ happen.” She instantly dissolved into a fit of shocked, hysterical giggles, delighted by the reference. Like I’m Encino Man, and couldn’t have possibly been aware of anything that happened in the world since… well, since Encino Man.
🎤…Let the rain fall down, I’m comin’ cleeeeeeeean…
You’d be wasted if you weren’t being ruined, and you’re too good to waste.
i need a man who’d kill for me
So, just to clarify, is that:
“I need a man who’d kill in my defense.”
…or:
“I need a man who’d kill his way through a summer camp full of slutty cheerleaders just to get to me.”
If it’s the latter, I have but one thing to say to you.
“Chh chh chh chh… ahh ahh ahh ahh…”
Maybe she’s just trying to hire a hit.
So, less Jason Voorhees and more Jason Bourne? No slutty cheerleaders?
Great. Thanks a lot, killjoyagain.
i need a man who’d kill for me
So, just to clarify, is that:
“I need a man who’d kill in my defense.”
…or:
“I need a man who’d kill his way through a summer camp full of slutty cheerleaders just to get to me.”
If it’s the latter, I have but one thing to say to you.
“Chh chh chh chh… ahh ahh ahh ahh…”
beat me and baby me 🍼
[pushes you down stairs]
What, you gonna cry now? You gonna cry, big baby? Why does your shoulder look like that, ya freaky li’l baby-head? I figured you had a soft spot on your skull, but I didn’t know your joints were made of taffy, too. Yeah, I bet it does hurt, but I don’t want to spoil you by running to you every time you scream, so I’m gonna go take a nap until I think you’ve learned your lesson.
Kids today…
Good lord I hope you’re in England. How I’d love to meet you 😍
dumbbigtittedslut-deactivated20:
I wish I was. All the best slags are British.
Don’t talk like that. Our sluts may not have a slag’s Old World charm and millennium of bad breeding, but no one works harder at whoring than the good ol’ North American skank.
I always get a little too excited when I see that @bedtimestoriesforbrokengirls liked some of my posts.
One can only imagine what will happen when he reblogs you.