Category: Questions & Answers

“Asks” from my Tumblr followers

when you were younger, did you ever imagine the internet growing the way it has or that you’d one day control the lives of many, have global reach, be the overlord of multiple living breathing human beings, and the founder of a cult-lite made up of who knows how many dedicated and adoring fans, all who found you through a shitty blogging website? Hell I grew up with the internet in full swing and that even seems outlandish to me

in short: how do you deal with that lol I’d be stressin

(submitted by: Anonymous)

RE: imagine the internet growing the way it has?

Depends on what part we’re looking at:

In terms of infrastructure: Up until about 2010? Yes. My early 90s vision for the internet and what it looked like in 2010 lined up pretty well. But I didn’t foresee the rise of algorithmic advertising and timelines, which was a huge miss on my part.

In terms of culture: Once upon a time, I thought the most important thing I could contribute to the world would be creating spaces for open, challenging, responsible conversation between rational adults.

But then smartphones came along… I expected the phones, but not the mass adoption of them. I expected Crackberries for semi-nerds, not iPhones for eight year olds. And suddenly the internet was flooded with, well… idiots. There had always been assholes and trolls and creeps, but they’d at least been bright-ish, and more importantly, invested in being seen to be bright. They respected intelligence enough to fear looking like fools, and that moderated their behavior.

You can talk to a smart asshole. You can manage a bright troll. You can apply peer-pressure to a clever creep. It might be exhausting, but you can do it. Because ultimately, everyone involved wants to be a functional member of the community.

We lost that. And I absolutely didn’t see it coming. I had no idea how quickly stupidity —when forced into a realm where intellect dominates— turns into nihilism.

RE: one day control the lives of many

By my mid-twenties, yes, I had an idea I would. I was deeply in denial about several aspects of the job, and frankly afraid of it… but it was there. Waiting to happen.

Did I know the internet would be integral to the development of that control? Again, yes. From the moment I first dialed in to a local BBS, I knew I’d found my medium. I mean, the first girl I met online moved in with me and never left… obviously, this is where I was meant to be.

As for global reach… honestly, no, I didn’t plan for it. The early online spaces were very U.S.-centric, and I seldom encountered people from outside my country unless I went looking for them.

No, I did not foresee the overlord bit. The hub of a harem? Sure. I knew I had that in me. The bigger things, the more profound things… they had to dawn on me slowly.

And the cult…? When I was eight, I convinced all the neighborhood kids to attend my afterschool classes, where I whipped them with sticks when they failed to answer questions I knew they were too ignorant to answer. When I was sixteen, I spurred a walk-out at my high school because I wanted to watch a movie in class and I knew better than the teachers. In my twenties, I led a schism in an online community because I thought we belonged on the web and I knew better than the grown-ups. I haven’t always been comfortable with it, but people are generally happier when I’m in charge.

And I’m happier when they make it worth my while.

RE: outlandish

I lost my virginity to a married woman who became so clingy that I had to convince her she was a lesbian to make her leave me alone. For my 21st birthday, all the women who worked with me at a retail store pooled their money and ordered me a stripper, then kicked management out of the next morning’s meeting so those on the day-shift could watch the video of the event. The foremost love of my life met me at the door of a hotel room with a collar around her neck and a loaded .357 in her purse.

And all of that was before AOL mailed their first floppy.

So yeah, I knew shit was going to get weird.

RE: how do I deal with that?

I remind myself that they’re here for me, and do my best.

I have enjoyed your blog for a while and wondered if I may get your advice on a dilemma I’m having.

A guy I’ve been chatting to for quite a while has asked me to be his pet slave. I have told him my limits and boundaries, and he says slaves don’t get limits. He wants me to be his slave in and out of the bedroom. The situation is more complicated as we live over 20 miles from each other. I don’t have a car, and I also have a young child. I have such anxiety about being his slave out of the bedroom as I have so many responsibilities. I’m scared I will constantly fail him due to attending to my child or my grandmother. I also care for 5 days a week, my household responsibilities, and all the things that come with the above. I also have very severe anxiety, which I take medication for as well as depression and am subject to weekly (almost) migraines and other health conditions. He owns a couple of businesses, and I’m just not sure how this would work. He seems confident it can work, and maybe it’s just my anxiety talking, but I’m so scared that I will just fail him and disappoint him, and he’ll leave.

Any advice would be greatly appreciated thank you for your time and sorry for going on a bit

Kiddo… wow. I don’t enjoy being this negative about someone you like, but… yikes.

You are not describing a serious man, sweetie.

  • You’ve been “chatting to [him] for quite a while”. Yet you either haven’t talked before about limitations, or you have talked about them and he bait-n-switched you once you were invested. In the former case, why the fuck is he soliciting you for unbounded sexual submission without even having some sort of preliminary discussion about Shit You Can’t Do, or How Others Will Be Affected? In the latter case, you can see how that makes him a malicious asshole, right?
  • Based on everything you’re saying, I’m assuming he didn’t ask you about your limits or boundaries. So do me a favor and think about how incurious he’d have to be to not bring it up. This is clearly not a deep thinker. You are a human being, who has accrued a collection of dependencies and responsibilities and passions and fears, all of which need to be addressed in some way when talking about enslaving you. You don’t cease to exist as both entity and necessity for your kid or grandma just ‘cause he says so. You shouldn’t need to ask a weird internet guy what to do… he should be listening to you, and should have already presented his broad-strokes plan for dealing with your concerns. But he hasn’t because he doesn’t care. Perhaps because he’s dumb, perhaps because none of this is real to him, perhaps because he your life doesn’t matter… whatever the case, you’ve got a problem.
  • If I poke a peanut down Blossom’s throat, there’s a decent chance she’ll die. (Or just wish she were dead.) Assuming I’m not out of my fucking mind, that’s a limit right there. I’m not a fucking faith-healer, and my semen —sadly— cannot cure her allergies… no matter how masterly my masterosity, one peanut = one dead piggy. So slaves not only “get” limits, they often come with them baked into their genes.
  • He can tell you what he expects of you, but he can’t tell you what “slaves” get. The world is full of service perverts who “get” all kinds of things he either can’t or won’t provide, and if you want any of them, you can have ‘em from someone else. His is not the only game in town, no matter how much he’d prefer you believe otherwise. This rejection of limitation is an aspect of this one man, not of sexual slavery in general.
  • Men who crave complete control should crave complete understanding. Absolutely nothing you’ve said suggests you feel understood.
  • I’m now going to give you the one piece of criticism I have to aim directly at you: it is ridiculous that you are so much as considering being someone’s “pet slave” when you have even one immutable, preeminent responsibility… much less two. Because yes, even if he were a thoughtful, empathetic, reasonable man, you’d still end up struggling to make him happy. Your world is busy and complicated, and adding him to the mix will make it dramatically more so… your relationship should be designed to give you lots of opportunities to succeed, but you’re setting yourself up for systemic failure.
  • It’s not just your anxiety talking. In the most charitable read of the situation, he is startlingly naive.
  • Stop worrying about him leaving, and start thinking about what it would take to make you stay. You should not involve yourself in all-consuming servitude out of submissive FOMO… you do it because he deserves your absolute devotion, and anything less is unthinkable. You’re nowhere close to that, and I don’t see how he’s even trying to get you there. He’s bringing you greater doubt, not certainty.

At the very least, he needs a reality check. Sit his ass down and insist he use his big-boy words to explain how he’s gonna fit in your world, how he’s gonna help you win, how he’ll use the inevitable losses to teach you lessons, and generally assure you that your very reasonable concerns are being very soberly considered and handled by a qualified adult.

And be careful. People are counting on you.

You sometimes allude to something that I think, and Im really Sorry, might be…

You sometimes allude to something that I think, and Im really Sorry, might be Scat/poop. You call girls toilets and talk about “the grossest stuff” needing cleanup. Is eating actual shit something that we should expect if we are pursuing you?

Okay, look, I think that kind of thing is objectively disgusting. I don’t want to see it, and it doesn’t turn me on. I don’t even like thinking about it. I showed the girls “2 girls 1 cup” just because they were missing a vital part of 2K culture, and I definitely laughed a lot at their distraught reactions, but by the end we were all pretty much…

On the other hand, one of the ickier cunts has asked that I please not interrupt the eating of my ass by showering first. So I suppose some of… that… could happen to some limited extent. And then I’ll just have to hose the bitch down with Listerine or something.

So to answer your question: no, it’s not something I expect. But girls are gross, and I wouldn’t put anything past a cunt.

When you say “no jail” do you mean “dont get caught” or “dont commit any crimes”?

I mean “don’t be reckless”.

We’re going to occasionally speed on a road trip. We’re going to eat weed gummies in places where weed gummies are unwelcome. We’re going to seek appropriate female reproductive services, no matter what some hick with a dick in a state legislature might say. Puddles is going to pee on the side of the road because her bladder is a squishy thimble, public indecency be damned. And so on.

So we’re going to be careful and judicious about speeding, we’re not gonna get high and drive, we’re gonna avoid accidents, and we’ll use the car doors to keep anyone from having to see The Pud pop a squat next to a highway. And so on.

Again, it boils down to “respect risks, and take them wisely”.

Do you like salsa? What kind is your favorite?

Do you like salsa? What kind is your favorite?

I do indeed like salsa.

As for a favorite? I like that kinda watery tomato salsa you get at hole-in-the-wall Mexican places —as opposed to the thick, smoothie-textured stuff you get from Tex-Mex— and I love a nice pineapple/onion/cilantro salsa on jerk chicken.

Also, the salsa should be cold, but it should still set my tongue on fire.

…how did you know all those asks were from me? I know a couple…

…how did you know all those asks were from me? I know a couple of them were back to back and that feels like a giveaway. But i also know at least one was sent like.,,,a day or two later.

Do you also know who i am ?

They seemed thematically consistent, not to mention, well… I’ve seen this process before.

And I know only what you tell me.