akachan-yurei-deactivated201508:
Yes
I don’t mind girls with tattoos, as long as they don’t mind men with belt sanders.
Category: Stories & Captions
A collection of stories, photo captions, and shoddy poetry
🙂
I’ll remember that smile later, long after you’ve lost it.
Play Date
A round of miniature golf still makes for a great first date.
You’re gonna have to sell that couch.
Evolution
It’s like a chimp in a tuxedo, only the teeth aren’t as scary.
And the chimp is more evolved.
Pretty sure this shouldn’t be arousing…
Pretty sure that shouldn’t is part of why it is.
You deserve all the pain your ass can absorb, just for wearing those ridiculous shoes. As soon as we’re done here, we’re going to the home of which ever girlfriend assured you they were cute, and I’m going to hold her while you slap the shit out of her for being a bad friend.
Triggering her is the easy part; the trick is in aiming her at something interesting and keeping your grip on her butt.
Where’s the money, Lebowski?!
I love you as the sun loves the skin it burns, or the darkness, the sin it hides. You are the bones within my feast, and I’ll pick my teeth with you before I’m through.