Search Results for: how many

I had a dream last might where you were so mean to me and I woke up and had to finish touching myself before I answered my boyfriend’s text messages.. Anything I can do to repay the fun memories?

Your poor boyfriend! First, his girl is squirming around all night dreaming about being hurt by a mean old man. Then, her first priority upon waking is jamming her hand between her legs and ruining herself with fantasies of that same old man.… Read the rest “I had a dream last might where you were so mean to me and I woke up and had to finish touching myself before I answered my boyfriend’s text messages.. Anything I can do to repay the fun memories?”

It is through your words that I came to realize that vocabulary is 90% of the art of seduction. I thank you for teaching so many people all that you know. 😊

⎯⎯⎯⎯⎯⎯⎯⎯⎯⎯⎯⎯⎯⎯

Flattery from pretty girls in their underwear… if this is how the world ends, there are worse ways to go.

misszoee:

FREE NUDES!!!!! 💖💖

Ok now I have your attention.

Guys. Guys. Now offering rewards to anyone who hooks me up with good caption/story filled blogs. Doesn’t have to be your blog! Just point me in the direction.

Ideally ones that don’t post full on porn cause I gotta either LOVEEE your blog or be in the right headspace to see dicks all causal like.

… Read the rest “”

are u familiar with the US version of the Office? cuz i bet youre Robert California irl

I will grant you that this exchange does a pretty good job of conveying the experience of any extended conversation with me:

But there’s also a lot of this guy in me:

And in high school, I had that suit. And that hair:

And, well… you know…

Life, it turns out, is a many Spadered thing.… Read the rest “are u familiar with the US version of the Office? cuz i bet youre Robert California irl”

Hello Mr. Bedtime. I’m a long-time follower, and I would scroll and edge my little brains out wishing I could find a man mean enough to have my best interests in mind. Well, I realized that I have to be pretty (and skinny) enough in order to even find a man to do these things, and so I have to start by holding /myself/ accountable. I’ve been working on my flexibility for a couple weeks, and today for the first time I am going to make myself puke! Thank you for motivating me to be the best me.

No.

Just… no. You sweet, stupid little fuck.

(I’m gonna say a bunch of things you already know, but maybe you’ll listen if I say it.)

Y’know what purging’s gonna get you, dummy? An ED and an ass just as fat as the one you started with.… Read the rest “Hello Mr. Bedtime. I’m a long-time follower, and I would scroll and edge my little brains out wishing I could find a man mean enough to have my best interests in mind. Well, I realized that I have to be pretty (and skinny) enough in order to even find a man to do these things, and so I have to start by holding /myself/ accountable. I’ve been working on my flexibility for a couple weeks, and today for the first time I am going to make myself puke! Thank you for motivating me to be the best me.”