how old are you | Bedtime Stories for Broken Girls

anewsubstory:

greedyagain:

gay-things-and-stuff:

gay-things-and-stuff:

caroldanvers-ismywife:

How do I explain to my family that Brie Larson can hip thrust 400lbs without making it sound like the gayest fact I’ve ever learnt

HoW!?

Damn.

I can hip thrust 250lbs, does that make me 60% as cool as Brie Larson?

… Read the rest

domestic–doll:

bedtimestoriesforbrokengirls:

domestic–doll:

I might move to an apartment that BG owns and I’m not gonna lie I’ve thought a lot about 24/7 surveillance and getting surprised by a cock ramming into me in the middle of the night 💁🏻‍♀️

Among the stuff I’ve learned over the last year: 24/7 surveillance is one of my favorite things.

… Read the rest

“Evolution Revolution Love” — Tricky

Okay, first, how can this song be 18 years old? An entire generation has grown up in that time… way to make me feel old, guys.

Second, I don’t think we really appreciated how much the low resolution and color bleeding of CRT televisions helped make the visual effects of the era effective… the face-changing thing from this video looked a little less goofy when you couldn’t make out the details.

My Fetishes?

neonborgy:

bedtimestoriesforbrokengirls:

Millennial girls who don’t know how to read analog clocks.

Actually, a Gen-X girl who couldn’t read an analog clock might be even hotter, but what are the chances someone that stupid lived into her forties?

whats an analog clock?

… Read the rest

Growing Apart

I’ve put up with a lot. The drinking, the drugs… the men. You’re an addict, and I try not to expect too much from you. Your weakness defines you, and I knew that going in. It’s no one’s fault but my own that I set out on a quest to fix you, so I’ve never blamed you, no matter how much you’ve deserved it.… Read the rest “Growing Apart”

Her: “He wasn’t my kind of forty year old man.”

Me: “Your kind of forty year old man is a fifty year old man.”

Anon: “Brats are anti-you, but still in your opinion submissive right ? I agree with everything you said I guess I’m just asking for even more elaboration, sorry to be a bother. I know I’ve seen a lot of disagreement over it.”… Read the rest “”

Hey, folks. I thought I’d introduce you to this chick I know. Her name’s Cindy… she’s a foreign exchange student who came to live with me over Christmas.

I’m not exactly sure how old she is; somewhere around 15, I think.… Read the rest “”

You wanna step into my world

It’s a sociopsychotic state of bliss

You’ve been delayed in the real world

How many times have you hit and missed?

Your CAT scan shows disfiguration

I want to laugh myself to death

With a misfired synapse

With a bent configuration

I’ll hold the line while you gasp for breath

You want to talk to me?

… Read the rest

Thoughts on Quentin Tarantino’s movies?

Okay, leaving out Natural Born Killers and his brief segment of Sin City…

True Romance: Eh. No amount of QT magic can overcome the sheer Tony Scott-ness of the thing. It has its moments, and an impressive cast, but I haven’t returned to it since the 90s.… Read the rest “Thoughts on Quentin Tarantino’s movies?”