It’s so romantic when couples hold hands while out for a stroll.
Tag: captions
Plumbing
Like a stupid cunt, a plunger is a single-purpose tool. Yesterday, he used it to stir a backed-up toilet that was full of shit… and now he’s doing it again today.
My Name Is Fuckpig
…of the Mayflower Fuckpigs…?
The Pack
[Attenborough voice]: The pack gathers around its kill and prepares for the night’s feast. They will have their fill, but the work begins anew tomorrow.
Into The Woods
Here’s how you properly take a whore into the woods:
- Go at night, dusk at the earliest. Also, stick to springtime; you want lots of forest noises.
- Strip your bitch down, tie her to the tree, and blindfold her.
- Tell her you’re going back to the car for something, or you’re just bored with her and want a nap.
When I was just a little girl, I asked my mother, what will I be? Will I be pretty? Will I be rich? Here's what she said to me: You were a mistake and no one will ever love you.
No one wants to be the only girl in the dungeon with a comb-over.
Ye Olde Caption Archive
… Read the rest “Ye Olde Caption Archive”Being a collection of recently-recovered content that Tumblr doesn’t like:
At some point, it stops being about bad choices.
See, if you make enough wrong turns, eventually, you won’t have the situational awareness to make an informed decision about the way home… you won’t know where you are or where you’re going.… Read the rest “”
How hard do I have to hit your tits before you stop moving?
Let’s explore the mystery together, shall we?