The exchange rate’s a helluva thing, ain’t it?
Breaking news! Scrolling through your blog for over an hour actually = 1 like & 1 ask response’s worth of attention!!
And now a reblog! That hour is really starting to pay off.… Read the rest “Turns out scrolling through your blog for over an hour = 1 like’s worth of attention 🙃”
… Read the rest “”Short Stories
“When did your ankles get thick?” he asked.
She frowned.
“I— all I said was ‘good morning’…”
He placed his coffee cup on the counter.
“Really? I wasn’t listening.”
This makes me so sad EVERY time I see it, without fail.
me: ‘dad, dad! Look my my biceps now’
him: ‘oh wow! Now you just gotta work on those triceps.’
😟
He got game.
Your mum’s private life might be far more interesting than you suspect.
Aww! Thank you @stupidlittlethingie
At this point, it’s clear that some people aren’t as scared of me as they should be.
… Read the rest “”I don’t know how you cunts do it.
In a way, you’re my life’s work, a puzzle I was built to ponder. I’ve spent years listening to you and analyzing your conflicted, constricted, and convoluted thoughts; you’re all such sad little knots, awaiting an Alexander to untangle you with the edge of a blade.
Her: Mr Bbbbbb! Gym is *killing* me! It’s almost being as mean as you ☹️
Me: What did Gym say to you, pumpkin? Did he touch you? Here, use this scale model to show me where he touched you!
Her: omg….… Read the rest “”
Her: So the guy at the shop said that, like, there’s a line on your tires, y’know? There are these indentations, see, and as you drive on the, like, the concrete or whatever, the indentations wear down to that line, and then your tire is no longer, I don’t know, legal or good or whatever.… Read the rest “”
Okay, that’s legitimately cute. I like where this stupidity is going. 😏
Will you pick me, yet? 🙊
Well, you’re cute and stubbornly patient, which are two qualities I prize. You might merit a beard-encounter on that basis.
But “princess”? 🙄 Keep your ambitions in check, child… you’ve got a much better shot at “chamber pot”.
