Tumblr just informed me that today is Bedtime Stories’ sixth birthday. In terms of sex blogs run by mean old men, that’s, like, a century. And if it feels forever to me, it must feel even more so to some of you… some of you little freaks have been with me your entire adult lives, through all my moods.… Read the rest “”
Any suggestion that the flu was done with me was premature.
Ugh.
It’s January, so naturally, it’s time for my annual two weeks of flu-driven misery.
Yay, 2020.
I lost it to a married woman many years my senior, in the front seat of her car, in a public park at noon.
Suffice it to say “awkward” doesn’t begin to describe the scenario.
Taller than miniature people.
Hey, folks. I thought I’d introduce you to this chick I know. Her name’s Cindy… she’s a foreign exchange student who came to live with me over Christmas.
I’m not exactly sure how old she is; somewhere around 15, I think.… Read the rest “”
Replaced the light bulbs in the bathroom.
It’s now bright enough for me to notice that my beard is rapidly developing a big gray patch on my chin.
Fuck you, illumination.
Update, almost four years later:
Gray. So, so much gray.
Me at the beginning of 2018: Taking on two masochistic little cunts who’d been following me around for years, deciding to pick them apart and see how they work.
Me at the end of 2018: Family game nights and reading bedtime stories over FaceTime and watching stuffed animals wave at me.… Read the rest “”
The best part about putting a camera in a girl’s home isn’t watching her fuck herself, verifying bedtime compliance, or using it to approve outfits.
It’s all the humiliating shit she does when she forgets you’re watching. It nourishes my soul.… Read the rest “Scenes From The Stupid Corner”
Just checked the mail and found a box of stuff I left behind at Idiot the Younger’s apartment, and found she’d included a nice Happy Thanksgiving card. I thought it was sweet.
Until I noticed that absolutely nowhere in the list of things she was thankful for did she mention the flavor and bouquet of my piss.… Read the rest “”
