My sister killed herself recently. We were always really open about our sexuality together. She shared your blog with me a while ago and I never cared to look until now. I miss her deeply. When I read all that you have to say, I feel closer to her and turned on.
First, I’m sorry about your sister. I hope the time she spent reading me gave her comfort or release, for at least a moment here and there. It was sweet and weird of her to share the blog with you in the first place, and I’m a big fan of sweet-and-weird, so I probably would have liked her.
More importantly, I’m sorry that you’ve been left to bear the weight of loss and confusion. I hope you’re taking care of yourself, leaning on the support available to you, and figuring out how her passing is going to inform your future. Because you can learn from her loss… continuing to grow is the greatest tribute any of us can ever give to the fallen.
But in the meantime… be a good girl and spread your legs, start rubbing, and keep scrolling.
You’re home now.
Weirdly, a little less than a year after this ask, I was dealing with my own family member’s suicide.
I can’t say I learned anything from it —he was old and feeble, and a bastard— but I now know for a fact that you can move on with your life in the aftermath.