…but you (or your words, since I don’t know *you*) still echo in my head sometimes. I’m not sure if this is easy to answer but when you talk about your girls, you talk a lot about wanting them when they happen to offer you something you want. I know that every relationship is to give/take, but what do you really mean by that? Is that a maturity thing, and she could grow into someone you’re interested in, is it physical, some specific exchange (good converstations, devotion…)?
It always catches my attention how you manage to sound both passionate and attentive but still have the upper hand as an object of adoration from the ones who love you. Maybe that unusual balance is why I keep coming back, too
Heck that got long! But I hope you have a great new year in 2022.
-B
(submitted by: @Anonymous)
The words only echo sometimes? You need to do something about that, young lady. I’ll settle for “most times”, just to be fair.
RE: “what do you really mean by that?”
I mean exactly what I said. If a girl wants to be close to me, she needs to bring something useful to the party.
There are a lot of people who want a slice of my time. To some degree, I apportion it by urgency… but this isn’t a charity for broken girls. My tastes and needs are large factors in determining where my gaze lingers.
Pretty matters, definitely. It can get your foot in the door, and when looking at someone makes me smile, I naturally want to look at her more often. But it’s a mixed blessing.
With a less visually appealing girl, the future is all upside… as she pleases me in her way, I’m going to look at her more closely. And when I do, I’m likely to spot the little flickers of beauty she’s hiding behind her awkward, unappealing surface… I will grow more attracted to her over time. Her ceiling may be lower, but so is the bar, and every good girl is at least a little hot.
By comparison, you should pity the pretty. Sure, putting her under the microscope may reveal a fractal pattern of beauty that replicates itself into infinity, but realistically, I’ll just spot the flaws that her clear and unmistakable hotness has otherwise obscured… and then I’ll tell her about them. (Share and enjoy.) After that, she’ll be searching my face for doubt every time she looks at me. She’ll search so hard that she’ll never, ever dare to look away, for fear she might miss something. Poor little thing.
So yeah, there’s a physical aspect.
All the other, obvious stuff follows from there. She has to know how to speak to me, and how to listen. She has to be obedient and devoted. She has to know her place. She has to win my trust.
That’s what I expect from everyone. That’s the ante when she sits down to play. What really matters is what she puts on the table next.
Is she a chef? Does she eat ass? Is she a pain sponge? Does she sing nicely? Is she a whore? Is she a hard worker? Is she a good hostess? Is she an attorney? Is she a plumber? Did her husband die mysteriously and leave her a large, poorly managed sawmill in the Pacific northwest?
The point is… what makes her useful? How will she improve my life? Why am I better with her at my feet?
RE: unusual balance
It’s not really unusual, since that’s how parenting operates. A father can be passionate and attentive, but no one ever forgets who made who.